DateLine March 31, 2011 time 3:04pm Bronx Zoo NYC:

The Celebrity Caricaturist Exclusive “Sketch Camera” caught Celeb Verne Troyer aka Mini Me getting bitten on the ass by the Bronx Zoo Cobra. The Bronx Zoo Cobra was euthanized by zoo cobra staff. Lars Commeechee head zoo keeper was qouted as saying “It was sad, yet funny”. John Lewis who also witnessed the alleged ass biting said “Mini Me seemed to enjoy it”. The Celebrity Caricaturist who is used to seeing stars said” I’m sure Mini Me saw more stars than I did”.
Verne was rushed to Belleveiw Hospital where he cried out, “that Bronx Zoo Cobra Sucks!” In actuality one of the zoo keepers sucked. Jasper Willis long time Bronx Zoo employee said “I quickly sucked the venom from Mini Me’s little Hiney”. Jasper is a real hero. As of the last words of the Bronx Zoo Snake, “Beam me up Scotty , I’m going to a better place”.